Wednesday, April 28, 2004

Any psychiatrists in the audience can have a go with this:

I just had the most adorable fantasy. Well, I thought it was adorable. I was a little kid, playing with my bestest friend in the whole wide world, in the bathtub. Unbeknownst to us, there was a shark sneaking right up behind us, and it proceeded to swallow me whole (my legs flailing, per usual). After devouring the two of us, he turned out to be Stanford, the cartoon shark mascot that demurely picks his teeth and grins after finishing his daily meal of children.


Okay, it doesn't sound cute, it sounds vile and disgusting. BUT, the fact that it was ME who was the little kid who got eaten while playing with her bestest friend in the whole wide world in the bathtub made me feel all warm and fuzzy inside when I came. Like, that shark ate me, but he was really just playing. He's a friend. Can we keep him, Mom?
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