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Tuesday, May 04, 2004

Hi! I’m Leticia McKenzie and you are here to eat me. I am honored to be a part of your chocolate sundae, so lick the flavor off of my thighs and let’s begin.

First, you need to treat me with respect. I am a whore, and whores make the world go round. Deal? Secondly, I am not going to be around much longer if you slurp me up, so let me enjoy my last moments. It’s not all that bad to be a whore, really, it’s the only way I can be appreciated. When you live out in the middle of nowhere and all your friends think you’re just weird, it’s hard to find somebody to talk to, so it’s nice to have somebody who thinks I breathe the universe.

Oh, my legs are gone now. How do you like them? Yes, they served me well. They were pretty curcy and knobby. Errrr... I mean tough. Not knobby. That would be gross. I mean to say that I was flexible... until now, now that I’m just a torso lying on a bed of ice cream. Say...

What are you doing?! Don’t smother me in chocolate sauce. I’m gonna drown... oooh, lick my boobies. You know, I could have been a mother... wait! I don’t need to be here! There are plenty of people who appreciate me! I’m not cheap! I didn’t need to put myself in the shrinker ray and cover myself in sugar to have somebody like me! But now, my legs are gone and—ouch! There goes my chest. Oh well, this is my swan song, it’s not a bad way to go, really. I’m gonna die in peace. (chomp)

Hey! There are other people down here! Hey girls, how’s it going? He convinced you to let him eat you all too, huh? Oh well... at least we have each other in a nice bath of stomach acids. How are you, Cindy? Oh, you’re just a head now. That’s okay, you’re my favorite disembodied head in the whole wide world. Who’s up for volleyball? (fzzzhhttt) Ah, to feel the stomach acid between my toes... my feet are dissolving. Precious. I’m just going to be unrecognizable goop soon, and that will be sexy.

Leticia

Very depressed.
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